Monday, August 29, 2005


It all goes in cycles. For several months this summer I was great. Great blood sugar, eating great, perfect weight, great social life etc. The past few weeks I've been letting myself get down. I see it happening, I feel like I can probably snap out of it if I just tried but it seems easier to just wallow in self pity sometimes. That is until I become so annoyed with myself that I finally try to snap out of it. Begin snap out of it phase.

I've been avoiding my blog because I was afraid of the boring, whine-tastic stuff I'd write. If I had been posted I would have talked about:

1. My visit to my general doctor about a constant ringing/popping in my ears accompanied by a headache. This has been going on for a few months now and it seems to be getting worse. My dad has tinnitus (ringing in the ears) but he got it when he was in his 40s, after working in many loud work environments. I figured I had something else, something that could be fixed. I haven't been doing anything to damage my ears. So I go to my doctor and she was horribly rude. Basically told me I would have this for the rest of my life and their is no cure (Thanks Doctor. I know what a chronic disease is.), but she would send me to a specialist. I have an appointment with an ENT (Ear, nose, throat) tomorrow. I also have some sinus/allergy stuff going on which is making everything worse. Needless to say, I wasn't happy after this.

2. My blood sugars haven't been all that great. Have I been slacking off? I didn't think I was slacking off, but what's the deal with these stupid 200s? and why don't I have any willpower? That cake/pie/cookie didn't even taste that great.

3. Exercise, or lack of. I haven't been to my gym in at least 6 weeks. I can't even find my card. What's with that? I'm in a bad mood so I don't go work out? That's the opposite of logical. You KNOW you feel better when you are exercising regularly. Blah blah blah.

4. New Friend. Yeah, the guy? The one who asked for my phone number and said we should hangout sometime soon? We've hung out, as friends. He's now started dating some other girl. I'm sooo good at reading people.

So, that's what I would have gone into way too much detail bitching about. Glad that's done.

This afternoon I have an endocrinologist appointment. I'll get my blood tests and see how I've actually been doing. Tomorrow I have my appointment with the ENT about the ringing in my ears. I hope to NOT have to get an MRI, which my regular doctor said I might need. Wednesday, I start back at my gym. No more excuses. I'll also start back up with the blog. I have almost reached my goal of $1000 for the JDRF walk and just emailed all my rich aunts and uncles today (after raising my goal) in hopes to bring in even more.


At 2:43 PM, Blogger Sandra Miller said...

Oh T,

I know what you mean about cycles, and needing to whine.

Just hang in there, girl. Your ear issue might very well be connected to the sinus problems you've been having (my husband has had ear popping and headaches whenever his sinus/allergy problems flare up).

And don't be so hard on yourself about exercising. Since you're still honeymooning, that can cause all kinds of problems with control, which in turn, can result in the kind of highs that make exercise very unappealing. You'll get back on track.

I like your plan for Wednesday...

Take care, and keep writing (don't worry if it's just to whine-- we all do it. It's your blog, and you're certainly entitled).



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